Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Always Look on the Bright Side

Me, Ralph Steadman, John Ensslin & friend, Nov. 6
Photo by Dick Nosbisch.

At last, my darkest days are over! My view of the world has changed immeasurably for the better. And no, it's not because the Dems gained control of both houses of Congress, though that cheered me up considerably. It's because yesterday at 4:46 p.m. MST, as the shadows of evening crept inexorably over Denver's bustling streets, I finally acquired a proper pair of eyeglasses with clear lenses.

Due to a perfect storm of errors on the part of eye doctor, opticians and optical lab--compounded by a lens that flew out and disappeared, and a frame that broke--for 18 days I'd been wearing sunglasses day and night. And I just want to say that nothing colors one's outlook as much as looking out at the world through glasses darkly.

I don't know how rock 'n' rollers can bear to wear shades all the time. No wonder there are so many depressing songs written. I even started to write one myself (apologies to Frank Sinatra & friends):
Looking at the world thru gray-colored glasses
Everything is dreary now
Yeah, shades look cool and hide telltale bags and wrinkles--not that I have any to hide, mind you--but they're hell at night. Darling Husband had to lead me by my good hand from the car to the school where we voted. "Great," I said. "Now I look blind and crippled!" (Hmm, maybe that's why everyone there was so nice to me.) Once inside, I read the Ralph Steadman book while we waited...and waited...and waited to vote. (My own Fear & Loathing at the Polls!) But it was tough going, as the dim light was made even dimmer by my eyewear. I had to give up making out the many illustrations, which are sadly murky and way too small to begin with, and eventually I gave up the reading as well.

Watching TV in sunglasses is a drag too. I'm farsighted, so at night I watched without them. Though due to astigmatism, I couldn't make out the credits very well; and not at all if they were in white type on black. Good thing I put the shades back on at the end of "Broadcast News," as I discovered that an old friend had been 1st assistant editor.

Today's song (apologies to Johnny Nash):
I can see clearly now, the shades are gone
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark specs that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun-Shiny day.
So Sun-Shiny, in fact, that I'll have to wear my sunglasses outside. Or maybe not...


Kim Stagliano said...

Bella, I have found that now that I am over 1600 years old (!) I need looooottts of light. I don't have reading glasses yet - but I get very ansty trying to read in low light. I can't imagine how annoying those 18 days were for you. But I'll bet you did look awfully cool.


Anonymous said...

Don't you just hate it when a lens pops out like that? Glad you're back to full vision again!

Bella Stander said...

I sure do hate it, and we're talking eyeglass--not contact--lenses here. I think my left eye is jinxed. The day we moved into our house, there were 60mph winds. While I was walking the dog, my left sunglass lens blew away, never to be found. Then 10 months later, I was out with the dog & the left eyeglass lens disappeared. No wind this time, but the lens was gone as gone can be. It had popped out a few days earlier while I was driving in heavy traffic, which was a bit hairy.

Kim Stagliano said...

Oy - my 6 year old (Miss Bella) recently dropped my glasses on the tile floor and out popped a lens. Then she carried the lens out of the bathroom. It took me two days to find the lens, under her sister's bed. I went to bed hoping Mark thought I looked like a sexy pirate, one eye closed to avoid Vertigo. I guess I looked more like Popeye, as he didn't make a move.... But laser surger still makes me nervous. I guess I'll wear contact and glasses forever.

I enjoy your blog, Bella.

Michael Patrick Leahy said...

As part of the over 50 crowd, I have concluded life now consists of two types of logistics:

1. Carting the kids around from school to sports to church to lessons.

2. Looking for my (fill in the blank) -- regular glasses, reading glasses, contact lenses, keys, wallet, book I am reading, article I am writing, cell phone that is ringing . . .

Anonymous said...

Were you wearing shades when we spoke on the phone last week? I thought you sounded extra cool...

Tish Cohen