Gawker quotes a Nerve interview, in which Schaeffer says:
"I ended a book deal from a major publisher in New York because the woman who runs the publishing company, when my dick was in her mouth, had her checkbook out and said, "I will buy your book now."Schaeffer's equipment must be button-sized if someone can enunciate clearly around it--AND handle a checkbook while doing so. (Kudos to the publishing exec for her multi-tasking ability.)
Call me crazy, but I'll bet Schaeffer stays unmarried a while longer.